Everything about this whole thing sucked. That kiss meant more to me than she knew, but I knew it meant nothing to her. Also, seeing the two of them together again killed me. He doesn’t deserve her after what he did, how does she take him back after that?
“You ok Max?” I heard Flower ask.
I turned my head to him and sighed, “I’m fine” I replied leaning down to lace up my skates.
I heard some chatter come into the dressing room and saw a crowd of guys coming in, including Kris. I just glared at him, in which he replied back with a long stare. He knew how I felt, but he didn’t care because he had her. He had her and I didn’t.
Practice felt longer than usual. I wasn’t on my game, ever since getting back from that shoulder surgery, nothing has been the same. Plus she has been on my mind.
I took a shower after practice and changed into my clothes. I left Mellon and drove anywhere but home. I decided to grab a coffee at Starbucks. I sat down near the window and took a sip of coffee when I spotted a familiar face out of the corner of my eye. Julie, with her laptop propped in front of her.
She caught my eye too and just smiled and waved and I went over and sat across from her.
“Hi” she smiled, “what are you doing here?”
“Just grabbing a coffee, I needed some time to think too”
“Oh really” she seemed interested as she shut her laptop, “what about?”
I wasn’t sure if I should tell her. Tell her that her smile is all I’ve been thinking about. Her blue eyes are burned into my brain. Her personality can light up the room, the sound of her laugh is stuck in my head like a bad song on repeat. Spending those few days with her changed my life completely. I feel like she’s made me a better person, she understands me, she just gets me.
“You still there?” she said quietly.
“You ok? You don’t seem like you”
“That’s cause I’m not like me…”
I moved my chair closer to her and she started to look nervous.
“What are you doing?” her voice was shaky.
I didn’t say anything, I just placed my hand on her cheek and slowly leaned in to kiss her. She resisted for a slight second but finally caved in. I pulled back and she just stared at me in shock.
“What?” was all she said.
“Julie, I know it’s probably not something you want to hear, but I love you”
“What?” she said again.
“I’m sorry, I’m done denying it”
“Max…I love Kris”
“Then what was that?”
“You kissed me”
“You didn’t exactly resist”
She just sighed, “Why are you doing this to me?”
“You know what? I need to go” she said putting her laptop in her bag and throwing it over her shoulder, “I’ll see you later”
eleven - is it ever gonna be enough?
6 years ago